5 Things I Wish I Did When My Son Was Younger

This article is for the parents or guardians of younger soccer players. It’s advice I wish I had read.

My oldest son, Kane, is 15 years old now and it’s been a fun journey seeing him progress over the years.

He’s had his fair share of successes and failures.

The game of soccer taught him many valuable lessons. He’s also made some incredible friendships and relationships.

Even though his journey isn’t done, I want to reflect back on five things I wish I had done when he was younger.

I hope this gives a little more perspective and reason for parents with younger club players.

1. Listened More With Less Critique: Kane and I had some great conversations during our car rides. On occasion, he would let his frustrations out and I would offer advice. But, sometimes I would critique him. For example, I would say he’s being a little too sensitive about a situation. I should have listened without providing much feedback. All they want is to be heard.
2. Enjoyed the Games More: Like most parents, I was on edge in many of Kane’s games. It sounds silly but when they are 8, the games don’t matter. Let them enjoy it and have fun. I wish I did the same.
3. Kept Doing Town Travel Longer: Club soccer can get pretty serious quickly. Kane started when he was 7. Although he played basketball and flag football, I wish I kept him in travel soccer for another few years. It’s fun and he gets to play with his school buddies. It would be more travel but he would’ve had a nice dose of fun and competitiveness.
4. Let Him Figure It Out More: As a parent, you want to see your child succeed. But, when money is involved, it can put pressure on the parent and player. Instead of letting the player figure it out, parents try to fast track the process. I did this at times. I would get upset when Kane took plays off or when he was “out to lunch”. I should’ve stepped back and let him figure it out more.
5. Not Worried So Much About Playing Time: When you are in it, it’s hard not to focus on how much playing time your son or daughter gets. I wish I cared less about it. At the end of the day, this can be a decade-long journey. Playing 30 min. versus 45 min. in fifth grade doesn’t matter. What matters is that they get better year by year.

Again, I hope this helps other parents not to have the same regrets I sometimes have.

This is all to say, I think I’ve done a great job. I’m patting myself on the back. My son is still happy playing the sport he loves. I’ve enjoyed the journey right by his side. That’s what matters.

At the end of the day, if you care less, enjoy the game more, and take a long-term approach, you’ll be golden.